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posted 19 Jan 2015, 12:39 by Gerry Kangalee

I write this full of fear and trepidation and hope than when I am gone at the hand of some law enforcement fundamentalist, Buddhist, Baptist or Adventist, all yuh kind enough to besiege the offices of NWU's wearing "I is Comrade Samuel'' jerseys for at least half day.

Bob Dylan in his classic "Just like Thom Tom blues” has lines that go "If you're lookin' to get silly you'd better go back to from where you came/ Cause the cops don't need you and ...man…they expect the same.''

Never mind the recycled appearances on the talk shows morning and evening. Clearly they plan to show what "police can do”, social media and instant viral re-play notwithstanding. And you do not even have to 'get silly'. You just have to be within arm’s reach to be man/woman handled.

So police women of late don't seem to give a @#$%^&* (Do not get me wrong. I am speaking of when they are in uniform. I do not know what happens when they change clothes. When they are not seeking to maim the already lame by staging their own police sports/para Olympics on High Street, they are practising what prison officers call "cell extraction' on Charlotte Street.

You see, dear readers, this dangerously parked female motorist could not be allowed to continue with her life of crime in the city. Next thing you know we would see a spike in illegally parked motorists sitting in their cars, opting for a parking ticket. The police, one imagines, saw the need to raise the threat level to 'orange'.

How they must cuss out Samsung and Steve Jobs! In the old days they use to beat up the camera man and smash the camera at will

So once again having heroically extracted the store owner from her Audi hideout, following a cuss-out of course, we can all walk the streets of Port-of-Spain safe in the knowledge that illegally parked motorists won't take over our city: day light robberies, murders and home invasions – yes! Illegal parking? Never!

P.S. Please remember you have to buy, print and wear your own jerseys