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posted 15 Dec 2015, 06:32 by Gerry Kangalee   [ updated 15 Dec 2015, 06:39 ]
A penny saved is a penny earned goes the old adage and money owed is money saved. This is from a person whose personal and family bills are met by the State and is guaranteed a full pension equivalent to his salary even if he had spent one week a Prime Minister and who moved into luxurious housing recently refurbished a few weeks ago.

Applying these oysters of wisdom from our overseas territory, I shall apply these principles to my utility bills for a starter. So TTEC, WASA, FLOW, and company ''Haul all yuh…” Moving right along I shall encourage all those mandated by the courts to pay alimony, child support or school fees to cease and desist immediately. Screw you officers of the court in this new period of belt tightening, even as I drive around without my seat belt! If I am given a ticket or my vehicle is impounded I shall plead the First. What is the First? It is the first time in the Commonwealth if not in the world that a sitting Prime Minister comes up with such an original way to justify withholding money owed to workers.

I can see a whole range of new litigants and defendants appearing before the courts though. Especially any of the low-life comrades who may have strayed on Murray Street, been entertained by a courtesan and then runs off, pants in hand, to save money for his hostess.

So fellahs please do not parang my house this Christmas: I eating all the black cake and pork, drinking all my sorrel and punch o' creme for myself to 'save' you the worry of having to digest food or get drunk. I shall trust all my pastelles and homemade bread and Christmas tree lights. The man who whackers my yard will have to settle for a handshake as the country follows this new Rowley-inspired economic model.

In the light of plans to increase borrowing one wonders if this is the plan of repayment to international lending agencies. Borrow now! Save later! Try telling the IADB or (gasp!gasp!) the IMF that.

Jack Warner: rock back baby. You ain't going nowhere. We owe you. Look at money you 'saved' for our footballers, the Haiti hurricane victims and our football staff over the years. This was not your idea was it? If not you certainly may have inspired it..

Finally, dear readers and 'savers' wherever you are, even as I sing the psalms of David on this coming Christmas morn, I refuse to speculate that this proposal may have come from the leader of a “Labour Party” who is now advising the government. After all he is a trained opportuni… (jeez that was close) economist. I do not have all that money to 'save' by having to pay a defamation suit. And I leave you with this updated Sparrow classic coming from the new Crusoe Kid; with all respects to the calypso king of the World "The Doctor say he and Colm will save as we earn.”